The Mum Juggle
Hey, I’m Marysia – wife, mum, multitasker, and someone who knows all too well what it feels like to be constantly juggling. The “mum juggle” – the balancing act between being a loving, present parent and a driven, capable professional – is one that so many of us are quietly battling every single day.
The expectations, the guilt, the endless comparisons – it’s a rollercoaster of emotions that too often leaves us feeling like we’re falling short. No matter how hard we try, something always seems to give. But maybe the problem isn’t us – maybe it’s the unrealistic pressures that society has built around what motherhood and work “should” look like.
The Unseen Pressure
Society still asks mothers to make an impossible choice: to either be fully committed to their children or fully committed to their careers – as though both can’t coexist. Why is it that being a working mum so often comes with judgment, whispers, and guilt?
There’s this unspoken rule that you must either “lean in” to your career or “lean out” for your family – as if balance is something reserved for the lucky few. Who decided that ambition and motherhood were mutually exclusive? That the moment you have children, you have to prove your worth all over again?
My Story: Four Days, Full Impact
In my previous leadership role, I worked closely with the founder – managing strategy, departments, and delivery. It was a demanding role that required vision, focus, and constant adaptability. I was proud of what I achieved. I could deliver more in four days a week than many did in five – leading teams, driving strategy, making things happen.
And yet, despite all that, I was made to feel guilty for taking one day off to be with my one-year-old. That precious day, the one where I could just be mum, somehow became a mark against my commitment. The irony? That day didn’t make me less capable; it made me more human, more creative, more grounded. It reminded me why I worked so hard in the first place.
The Myth of Support: When Flexibility Isn’t Really Flexible
We keep hearing that things are changing, that the four-day week is on the rise, that flexible working is the new normal, that working mums are finally supported. But for many of us, that support feels like a myth.
Time and time again, I’ve found it near impossible to land a role that truly reflects my experience and expertise while also offering the one thing I need most – that single, precious day to be mum. That day shouldn’t disqualify me from roles I’m more than qualified for. And yet, so often, it does.
It’s disheartening to be told that “work-life balance matters,” only to find that most workplaces still value presence over performance, and still equate flexibility with a lack of ambition. The system proudly speaks the language of progress, but the reality for many mothers tells a very different story.
The Cost of the Juggle
The emotional toll of all this is huge. The exhaustion, the self-doubt, the guilt that creeps in no matter which way you turn. When you’re at work, you feel you’re missing out at home. When you’re at home, you worry you’re not giving enough to your job. It’s a constant tug-of-war that leaves you stretched thin and questioning yourself.
Add to that the financial side, the eye-watering nursery bills, the price of childcare often matching what you earn – and it’s no wonder so many mothers are burning out.
But the cost isn’t just financial. It’s mental, emotional, and physical. When the world tells us to “have it all,” it rarely stops to ask: at what cost?
The Other Side: The Stay-at-Home Mum Stigma
And then there’s the other side of the coin – the stay-at-home mums. The women who’ve chosen (or sometimes been forced) to step away from work to focus on raising their children. Society often labels that as the “easy” option, but anyone who’s lived it knows it’s anything but.
It’s long days, little rest, endless demands, and very little recognition. It’s full-time, unpaid, emotionally demanding work that requires patience, creativity, and resilience in equal measure. It’s the hardest job in the world – yet one that’s rarely valued as such.
There’s no right or wrong path here. Whether you’re working full-time, part-time, or at home, every mother is doing her best in a system that still doesn’t fully support or appreciate either side.
The Joy Among the Chaos
Yet, even in the chaos, there’s beauty. My children are my light, my laughter, my grounding force. They remind me daily why I do what I do. They inspire my creativity at work, and they teach me lessons in patience and perspective that no leadership course ever could.
Being their mum is my greatest role, not because it’s easy, but because it’s real. It’s messy, exhausting, and beautiful all at once.
Redefining What ‘Having It All’ Really Means
Maybe the goal isn’t to “do it all.” Maybe it’s to redefine what success, balance, and motherhood really mean. To stop measuring our worth by hours worked or milestones achieved, and instead, start honouring the quiet strength it takes to juggle it all with love.
We need to normalise the idea that being a mother and being ambitious can exist side by side. That flexibility isn’t a favour – it’s a necessity. That balance isn’t weakness – it’s wisdom.
A Call for Change
It’s time we move beyond the slogans and start building systems that truly support working parents – not just in theory, but in practice. We need workplaces that value output over optics, that recognise that motherhood builds resilience, empathy, and leadership in ways no job title ever could.
Because being a mother doesn’t make you less capable. It makes you unstoppable.
If This Resonates With You…
If any part of this feels familiar – if you’re juggling, doubting, or just trying to hold it all together, please know you’re not alone. There’s no one right way to be a mum, and there’s no shame in asking for help, connection, or advice. Here are some supportive organisations and resources that might help:
